Hearing about Jason’s death has been a bit of a shock to me. I haven’t spoken to him in any fashion for a few years, ever since coming up to the Havens as an Ephemeral. When we did interact, he was one of my favorite folks. He was a good guy – impulsive, like so many people are, but well-intentioned, and with a great enjoyment of Lusternia. On the other hand, that impulsivity seems to have led to his passing.
I don’t have any more details about the passing of Jason – or Vathael, as his main character here was named – than you do. What I remember was Vathael as a Fainite and a member of d’Murani, someone devoted to his guild, to the city, and to the game. He was active in the same clans as I was and in some of the same circles. What I remember was that he was a calm fellow who was as inclined to help people as he was to enjoy a bit of PVP, and that he was a valued member of the family.
I have a lot of questions I’d love to ask Jason. Chief among those: why? What happened? I’m sad, and upset, both because he’s’ gone, and for the family he’s left behind. His end was not an answer, much less, I think, what he was looking for.
On that note – as a friend earlier this year said on the passing of someone in a similar matter: “Just: Ask. For. Help. Don’t be afraid to be a burden. Do everything you need to do to keep breathing.”
And in the words of someone not a friend, but much admired, on the passing of another person, also from the same thing that claimed Jason, from a piece called “Don’t Give Up”:
“But you must not give up. Never give in. Fuck all and fuck the world and fuck these enemies you fear which tear you down little by little every breath you take. You must fight; even when your enemies are those who love you and even when they are ones you love. You must fight for yourself and cling to those things that give you strength: your faith, yourself, your knowledge that no matter what may happen to you right in the here and now, the sun also rises tomorrow.”
Goodbye, Jason. I’m sorry.