Unlike many of the gutless spit-wads that vomit their pathetic excuses
for writing upon this board, I will claim to be an expert on language,
and therefore writing, even should I prove myself wrong with errors in
this post. The Basin of Life seems to have forgotten an important part
of critical and rhetorical writing: the conclusion. Therefore, as the
sole expert on the common tongue in Lusternia, I will assume the
position of "Professor" and instruct the ignorant masses on the proper,
aforementioned technique, since the valuable skill seems to have been
lost somewhere in the Portal of Fate.

Before I begin to pound the definition of a conclusion into the feeble
mind of you, the reader, let me begin by saying, "You must be firm in
your convictions." Take, for example, the previous article: Selthar
claims that he is not whining, or that he does not wish to point
fingers, yet that whining and pointing of fingers is exactly what he
does in his writing. His last point happens to be "sorry, I don't have
any horehound," driving his whining home to the reader. I, on the other
hand, will be remarkably blunt. This paragraph is a personal attack
against you, Selthar, because your writing skills are very poor.

Let's proceed to the common affirmation of "this post is entirely of my
own opinion. Do not associate with my views with any organization I am
part of, because it's only my own opinion," and other combinations of
words that convey the same meaning. These affirmations weaken your post
to the extent of making it laughably unworthy of reading. In fact, I
encourage you all to ignore any posts that contain remarkably uninformed
opinions that are expressed within the terrible "essays" and "posts"
they scribe with a blunt stick dipped in mud. Of course your writing
contains your opinion! You write because you have an opinion on
something. And if you're going to sever your opinions from those of the
organizations you are sworn to, you might as well sever your oath to
said organizations at the same time, for you apparently don't think the
same as the "rest of the group."

Finally, let us proceed to the much vaunted and forgotten conclusion.
Selthar, for example, has an acceptable, but by no means outstanding,
conclusion: "curse you, overharvesters." Had this simple sentence been
the entirety of his post, his entire point would have been completely
made without the fallacy of claiming not to point fingers.

I don't even dare to delve into the assortment of phrases slapped
together and posted hastily on the public board before me, for most are
of a quality I would not use to feed a dead locust. Some lack strong
opinions, and the rest lack conclusions or even points.

Nathon De'ravenna,
First Professor of Lusternian Linguistics.

P. S.
This post contains only my own opinion. As well as the opinion of anyone
who dares call himself a writer.

Penned by my hand on the 15th of Klangiary, in the year 102 CE.