School Funnies

by Unknown

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Unknown2009-03-23 19:32:42
We were organizing into groups for the term project and one member of the group had to send an E-mail to the prof and fellow group members with the names and e-mails of the students in the group.
One guy misspells HIS OWN NAME. The prof hands him a dry erase marker and has him walk down to the front of the room and write his own name for everyone to see.

This is a second hand one:
For a philosophy final, the prof puts a chair on the desk and says, "Write an essay proving to me that this chair doesn't exist." The first person to finish the exam finishes it within one minute and gets the highest grade on the exam. The essay had two words:
"What chair?"

This one my dad told me:
He was in some crazy mechanical high level engineering course and he had an exam. The exam questions were all long and complex. My dad is the first person done with the exam and finished it in about 30 seconds. The VERY LAST QUESTION on the exam on the VERY LAST PAGE said:
Put your name on the top of the exam, don't do any other questions and turn the exam in.

This one my brother told me:
One particular prof is real stickler for due dates. When he says AT THE START OF CLASS, he means AT THE START OF CLASS. If you're 5 minutes late, you're SOL. The student asks the prof "Do you know who I am?" Prof says "no" student takes the neat stack of assignments, throws them up in the air, along with his own and walks out.
Unknown2009-03-24 08:46:26
The last one was a commercial.
Vhaas2009-03-24 08:57:10
It was from a movie. I forget which, but I recall seeing it on Comedy Central.
Xenthos2009-03-26 00:56:43
QUOTE (Fireweaver @ Mar 23 2009, 03:32 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
We were organizing into groups for the term project and one member of the group had to send an E-mail to the prof and fellow group members with the names and e-mails of the students in the group.
One guy misspells HIS OWN NAME. The prof hands him a dry erase marker and has him walk down to the front of the room and write his own name for everyone to see.

In keeping with this: one class I had, every quiz had five questions worth 2 points each. The first two points were always freebies-- 2 points for writing your name at the top of the page.

A student mis-spelled his name. First year, about halfway through the semester (so we had already had 6 successful quizzes with no issues).

He lost the free points, and it followed him for the next three years, too. tongue.gif
Navaryn2009-03-26 02:09:49
QUOTE
This is a second hand one:
For a philosophy final, the prof puts a chair on the desk and says, "Write an essay proving to me that this chair doesn't exist." The first person to finish the exam finishes it within one minute and gets the highest grade on the exam. The essay had two words:
"What chair?"


I heard something similar.

Also for a philosophy exam, a question was something like : "Why is there life?". A guy answered "Why not?" and apparently, it turned out to be the best answer tongue.gif
Unknown2009-03-26 05:41:45
QUOTE (Fireweaver @ Mar 23 2009, 07:32 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
This is a second hand one:
For a philosophy final, the prof puts a chair on the desk and says, "Write an essay proving to me that this chair doesn't exist." The first person to finish the exam finishes it within one minute and gets the highest grade on the exam. The essay had two words:
"What chair?"


This is a semi-urban legend that floats around every philosophy class, though usually I hear it "Professor writes "Why" on the board, and the top grade in the class just replied "Why not". If I were the instructor, I'd write "You're not funny. You're not even original. And on top of it all, you just failed" at the top of their page.

As for something I've actually had happen-

In Crim law, we were discussing consent as it applied to rape cases. The professor was using the old socratic method, a.k.a., you will be called on, at random, at any point, for any amount of time. This particular prof. liked to choose one person, and drill them into the ground with one case. Well, while discussing consent, he calls on this sort of amusingly odd guy that sat up near the top of the lecture hall.

He asks the professor "if she agrees to sex, but I say "come on baby, I want anal", but she doesn't want to, would it be rape?"

And after the uncomfortable pause of 100+ people, continues

"and what if it's my birthday?"

...which really raised more questions than answered.
Diamondais2009-03-26 06:33:58
My computers exam last semester, my friend didn't study at all for it, and really just didn't care for the class anymore.

One of the questions was to explain how to create a table showing data in Excel, so she drew a table and wrote Excel on it.

There were a couple other little things she did but that's the one that stuck in my mind.

She got partial marks for being funny.
Aison2009-03-26 07:03:29
QUOTE (Fireweaver @ Mar 23 2009, 12:32 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
This one my dad told me:
He was in some crazy mechanical high level engineering course and he had an exam. The exam questions were all long and complex. My dad is the first person done with the exam and finished it in about 30 seconds. The VERY LAST QUESTION on the exam on the VERY LAST PAGE said:
Put your name on the top of the exam, don't do any other questions and turn the exam in.


I did that when I was a freshmen in high school, in my computer-business class. Only the teacher was a complete dick so if you actually went through and did the test (like a no censor.gif test), you only got half the grade and had to stand up and announce you were a moron for not reading the entire test before starting it.

He was crazy, and when I graduated, became a teacher for mentally handicapped kids.

edit: oh, right, funny stories. I have two.

I remember in middle school, in my journalism/yearbook class, we used to get phone calls on the class phone. Every time it was some guy asking for Shelly, without fail. After months of him calling at least once every two weeks, asking for Shelly, my teacher picked up the phone:

"Hello? ... Shelly's dead." and she hung up.

Also in this class, there were only 2 boys and 5 girls. A very small class, obviously. We had a substitute teacher one day and one of the girls had a semi-complicated name. "Rem-ee-liiii-zza?" "It's pronounced: Rem-uh-leesa." she corrected. The sub pronounces it again and moves through the girls and goes, "Is Robert here?"

Robert looks up from his desk and he goes, "It's pronounced Frank."

Acrune2009-03-27 21:03:15
I had a networking class where the prof would lecture off a power point the whole time. He would just walk back and forth in front of the screen, droning on and on, gesturing at the screen now and then.

One day he forgot to turn on the screen, and didn't notice for 15 minutes. He would change the power point slides, leave the computer, walk back and forth in front of the dark screen, and gesture at it, while droning on about what was on the slide we couldn't see.

Oh, he didn't actually notice it was off. Someone finally told him after the 15 minutes laugh.gif